You're hard on yourself. You know it. Your partner knows it.
Critical self-talk can often seep into your relationship, causing tension and conflict. You don't have to let your inner critic run the show. You can learn to let go of those negative thoughts and improve your relationship in the process.
Our Critical inner voice can be incredibly destructive causing us to act in ways that are defensive and destructive. For example: we may become overly critical of our partner or we may start to withdraw from them emotionally or we may even lash out at them verbally or physically. You need to learn how to quiet your inner critic, how to let go of your sense of unworthiness and give yourself permission to be loved and accepted just as you are.
Maybe as a child, you were always criticized by your parents or teachers. Maybe you had an experience in your teenage years that led you to believe that you weren't good enough. Critical Self-Talk is often based on things that happened in the past - things that may no longer be relevant or true.
Maybe you grew up with a critical parent who always pointed out your flaws. As an adult, you might find yourself constantly putting yourself down or obsessing over your mistakes. Whatever the source may be, it's important to understand it and accept it. Only then you start to forgive yourself and move on.
The best way to let go of your inner circle and improve your relationship is by practicing mindfulness. Start by noticing when a thought pops into your head and accepting it without judgement. Redirect this critical self-talk into something more helpful and loving.