8 Secure Dating Behaviors

1. Taking things slow

Arrow Someone who is secure in themselves takes thing slow. Why? Because they have a full life, have different sources that provide them emotional nutritional value and are also evaluating the other person for the prestigious position of being their long-term partner.

2. Mature vulnerability

Arrow Secure people aren't afraid of being vulnerable and putting their guard down, but they also understand that showcasing all the wounds on the first date isn't vulnerability but emotional dumping and oversharing.

3. Strong individual identity

Arrow While they are compassionate and kind human beings, they have a sense of right and wrong, aren't afraid of disagreeing and standing up for their beliefs, values and principles.

4. They don't prove their worth.

Arrow While they understand that relationships require a balance of healthy give and take, they don't associate their worthiness with how much they can do for the other person. They understand that dating is about expressing themselves and looking for alignment, it is not about impressing people.

5. They are the choosers.

Arrow Instead of stepping into the dating realm trying to get chosen by anyone who reciprocates interest, they place high value on themselves and look for a truly worthwhile partner. Instead of asking, "Am I good enough for them?" They ask, "Is this person good enough for me, my life and my well-being?"

6. They live in reality, not fantasy.

Arrow They see the other person for who they truly are (positives + negatives) instead of projecting their high interest on them and turning them into someone that doesn't exist in reality.

7. Direct communication

Arrow Instead of resorting to 'protest behavior'/ passive aggression and expecting that their partner should just read their mind, they are clear and direct about their needs, expectations and boundaries.

8. Power to walk away.

Arrow They are okay with losing dating prospects, they aren't okay with losing themselves. They don't run away at the first sign of discomfort but if the other person's pattern continues harming their well-being, they are not afraid to walk away. Their desire for finding the right relationship is much greater than their desperation to keep just about any relationship.